You are

I see your characteristics and the things that create your identity. Your gender, your age, the shape of your nose and the colour of your skin.
I see things that seem imperfect to you but so perfect to me.
I see these things that bring you shame, and hurt; they are part of your story but they DO NOT define you.

You my friend are NOT defined by the number on your school paper, or whether you finished school at all.
You are not defined by your parents, the things they have said or the things that they didn’t say when you needed to hear it the most.
You are not defined by the scale you stand on or the size of your shirt, OR your job, OR your marital status, OR your wealth.
You are not defined by the neighbourhood you live in or how big OR how small your house is.
You are not defined by what you have lost or what you have found.
By what you have accomplished or haven’t yet finished.
You are not defined by your religion, by the media, or by the country you live in.
You are not defined by the moment you lashed out when you weren’t feeling yourself.
You are not defined by your children, the choices you have made or the ones that you didn’t make.
You are not defined by your breakdowns OR your breakthroughs, the things that you have said and the things that you forgot to say.
You are not defined by the moments you lost courage or the moments you stayed quiet.
You are not defined by your voice or the important things you were meant to say.
You are not defined by how many friends you have or how many you have lost.
By the moment you walked away or the time that you didn’t say goodbye.
You are not defined by what people say about you behind closed doors or the things they don’t say at all.
You are not defined by the horrible things you say to yourself when no one else is looking, and in your darkest moments…
By the moments you showed up small, showed up big OR the choices you made when you had lost your path.

You, my friend, are defined by the warmth of your smile.
By the light in your eyes.
By how you show up when you are needed the most.
By your kindness and your compassion.
By your strength and your softness.
By how courageous you are in the most vulnerable moments.
By how imperfect you can be which just reminds people that they are not alone.

You are everything a friend, a mother, a father, a sister, a brother, a child, a stranger could ask for. In a world with so much hate, so much shame, so much guilt, so much loss; I want you to know that you are ENOUGH.

Written by Kelly Nightingale